I am often asked by frustrated parents how they can go about helping their child succeed in school. After all, every parent wants just that. And, it seems like if your child isn't doing well in school that the world is spinning out of control in more ways than one.

So, what do I tell them to do? The first thing is to relax and take a deep breath. Now, let's go to the core of the problem.

The first thing you have to do is find the reason for the poor academic performance. Telling your child to try harder usually doesn't get the job done. Think about it. Don't you think they want to do well in school, too? So, find out where the problem lies.

I usually find that the child is weak in visual processing. How can a parent tell? Hold a pencil up in front of your child's eyes and move it slowly back and forth. Have your child follow the pencil with his eyes. Now, watch those eyes. Are they moving back and forth smoothly, or are they moving in an erratic fashion? This can let you know what your child's eyes are doing when asked to do school work. If they are moving smoothly, then reading and school work will also be easy.

Another system that needs checked is the auditory processing system. Say four unrelated words to your child. Ask the child to repeat them to you. Were they all correct? Another thing that you can do is check to see if your child has trouble alphabetizing words. Does your child have a difficult time following directions? These are all indications that the auditory system is in distress.

The other system that needs checking is the kinesthetic. Look at your child's writing. Is it legible? Are the words spelled correctly and spaced evenly apart? Are the capital letters larger than the small letters? Is the handwriting very small or very large? Is your child somewhat awkward?

OK, so now you know which systems are weak. If you want to help your child overcome learning difficulties, then these systems must be strengthened. There are so many exercises and activities that can help. What won't help is telling the student to try harder.